Maybe your social circle has never been bigger and never been stronger. But you’re bothered by one thing: all your friends look great without plastic surgery and you’re thinking about getting work done. Now, before we go any further we should probably make a few things clear:
- I’m not suggesting that somehow everybody should get plastic surgery
- Jealousy in general can be toxic for good friendships (rivalry is something else—but too many friendships between women are portrayed as competitive rather than supportive)
- I’m not talking just about women
What Should You Do if Your Friends Look Great Without Surgery?
We’re used to thinking about plastic surgery as a way of combating one’s own insecurities. Usually it’s more about trying to get your body to line up with your body image. In any case, plastic surgery can be complicated—and that can lead to some pretty complex feelings when you’re thinking about a procedure—but all your friends look great without plastic surgery.
It’s Not a Competition
First and foremost, it’s important to remember that it’s not a competition. If you feel like you’d be more confident with a different nose shape, that’s one thing. If you feel like your friends are shaming your current nose shape, that’s another (and your friends are kind of crummy).
During your consultation with a plastic surgeon, you’ll probably spend a fair bit of time discussing your motivations for surgery, ensuring they’re coming from a place of genuine desire. Most surgeons want to make sure you aren’t acting due to outside pressure, in other words.
So the best thing you can do, really, is to focus on yourself. Focus on what you want, on what’s going to make you feel confident. Let everything else fall by the wayside. And that’s true whether you want a facelift or a tummy tuck. It’s about you, not about anyone else (even people as awesome as your friends).
Cosmetic Surgery vs. Plastic Surgery
First and foremost, we can talk about the differences between cosmetic and plastic surgery. Because it’s quite possible that while your friends haven’t undergone any plastic surgery procedure, they have gotten some cosmetic surgery done. Cosmetic surgery, essentially, is shorthand for noninvasive (usually non surgical) procedure: Botox, Juvederm, Kybella, Coolsculpting, you name it.
There are definite advantages to these procedures:
- They’re difficult to spot: Cosmetic procedures will often generate tangible but subtle results
- They don’t interfere with your daily life: In most cases, cosmetic procedures can be done relatively quickly (even over your lunchbreak)
- Easy recovery: With the exception of a few procedures (such as laser energy treatments), most patients are able to return to work or, you know, life almost immediately after their procedures.
It’s entirely possible that your friends have been getting cosmetic procedures all this time without your knowledge (remember, though, you should keep your focus on you). And this brings up another interesting question: if your friends can get results with cosmetic surgery—with Botox and Juvederm injections—why can’t you do that instead of plastic surgery?
Choose Your Own Adventure
That’s not an uncommon train of thought. The answer to that question will depend on what you want to get out of the deal. Botox and Juvederm are designed to treat specific types of wrinkles and lines. Where as a facelife is performed in order to eliminate excess tissue and provide results across the entire face.
Results from surgery are usually much more bold, noticeable, and comprehensive than results from any type of cosmetic procedure. For some patients, that’s going to be perfect. For other patients, a more subtle approach might be called for.
The best way to find out is to talk to a surgeon or visit a medspa and talk to a surgeon.
Focus on Yourself
There’s a very human tendency to hold yourself in comparison to someone else. Dave doesn’t have wrinkles and I do. Jane as fewer gray hairs than I do. That kind of thing. Everyone does it. The trick is not to let it guide your decisions, especially when it comes to something permanent, such as plastic surgery.
The only way to get around that is to focus on yourself. If all of your friends look great without plastic surgery, that’s an entirely different topic than your own procedure. You’ll make the best decisions when you successfully keep them separate (well, as separate as you can).
The most important thing is that you feel comfortable and confident in your own skin—however that’s accomplished! That’s something you and your friends can get behind.